My brother, 53, is unfortunately mentally ill, but is clear in his mind. After losing sight of each other for years, we got closer again 3 months ago. I'm only 1 year younger. After he had totally isolated himself for the past 20 years and had hardly any external contact, he also had no PC or cell phone, no house phone or door intercom so he was never to be reached.
Now I got him a notebook, a printer, a key cell phone and a radio CD player. Only after a period of 3 months will he be able to cope with it a bit, because he has never had anything like it. So I had to explain everything to him from the start. Of course he can't remember everything, so I often have to explain something again. (He already has a new TV.)
The question is, how can I make him happy without overwhelming him?
(He already has a new TV.)
Alexa
Thanks good idea. But he doesn't have internet and for a good reason he won't get one.
It depends on how far he dares to go to the front door. A bike would also be good so that it has some movement and can see something other than your own four walls. But your brother has to decide if he wants that. You can ask him if he wants a bike, but don't push him to do it.
Does he want all the stuff at all? Was that his wish? Maybe he'd rather read books and watch the birds. The flood of media can be overwhelming.
HM okay. Maybe a hobbie or something?
Does it have to be something electronic?
No idea! Hobby? Yes…
He does such crazy things that he writes strangers around the world and sends them something senseless, even his invented short stories.
He also sells photo paper that he bought for 5 euro in the DM market for 3,000 USD. It may be that someone is interested, he thinks. It only has to buy one of the 100s he wrote and it was worth it. He does such crazy things. Hence no internet, who knows what he would do with it.
I wouldn't just give him material things.
Go play darts with him or something. Others also wrote that you could offer him a bike.
He was quite interested. But the notebook seems to overwhelm him. He has already typed 2 of his short stories on it… I don't know yet whether he is ready for more. It is a little difficult to operate the printer.
No he doesn't want a bike. He prefers to walk. I gave him laundry and stockings and a few sandals because his were totally over and it didn't bother him. For my birthday I bought him a T-shirt and a polo shirt and he also got a perfume from Karl Lagerfeld and aftershave from Nivea. He is not demanding, so it makes no sense to give him something expensive, because he can't distinguish it or appreciate it.
My parents have 4 bicycles in the garage and he never used any of them. He prefers to walk and likes to take the tram.
Why don't you let him write his short stories? He doesn't have to publish it anywhere.
As I said, I would do something with him, hike, etc.
He has a whole folder full of short stories. I read 2 through. Nothing special. He wants to gradually type and save them on the notebook. In 3 months we only managed 2. He often has no desire and is tired and until then he has forgotten some things how to open or save a new file. It was already difficult when I had to stick with it until he typed the 3 DIN A 4 pages, because if something went wrong he didn't know what to do. So I have to stick with it. Because it is enough that the course is somewhere else and he is already irritated and does not know what to do. Or he accidentally gets on the touchpad and marks a text or moves something and there's real chaos. A normal person can't imagine how many problems you can have with the notebook if you are not familiar with it.
Yes, we were the last time we had coffee together. He wanted to go out, so I spontaneously went with him. Of course I drank my wheat and no coffee.
That is more than enough.
he has to learn to deal with it first, otherwise it doesn't work.
