First of all, the coming child with whom I'm now in SSW 22 was wanted and planned and we were really happy when it worked after several exits. Since the 13th week, however, my partner has made life hell for me. I swallow it, because he already welcomed me well with a 3-year-old child and treated himself very, very well until a few weeks ago.
The fact that I'm now pregnant and my belly grows more and more seems to repel him as well… Because automatically a somewhat chubby woman with a growing ball looks a lot more poundy.
My husband breaks my self-confidence and self-esteem…
accordingly he insults me about my weight gain and I must not show any emotions, otherwise I'm just hissed, everything I do and say is wrong.
He is never at home in the evening and always on the go and I rarely get to know. I'm now pregnant with a 5 year old at home and cry my soul out. I also have the feeling that he is cheating on me because he no longer gives me affection.
He also said lately that he doesn't want the child anymore because I have changed so much and the child will destroy his life. On the laptop I recently found the last page where he googled "separation with a pregnant woman" "follow the separation".
can this relationship still be saved?
does it make sense to save them?
I don't want to be alone again and now with 2 children from 2 men.
I can't do all of that either
I absolutely can't enjoy this pregnancy and I envy all couples who treat each other so lovingly at this wonderful time. I'm afraid to eat him because he always looks at me so stupidly, I also weigh "first" 66kg to a size of 1.73 in SSW 22. My gynecologist and my friends said that I still looked "not pregnant" anyway…
I swallow it, because he already welcomed me well with a 3-year-old child and treated himself very, very well until a few weeks ago.
But you owe him exactly one thing: nothing. He decided that because he wanted it that way, not because he thought he was getting something for it.
And now he probably doesn't want that anymore. Pregnancy, even an intentional one, always puts a partnership to the test. And your guy clearly shows that he doesn't pass this test. Unfortunately, you can't know that beforehand, but there's no point in trying to get through anything now. You have to think of yourself and your children, not of your relationship, which is only in third place.
He took you in with a finished child and had no idea about pregnancy and the problems associated with it. Try to make it clear to him that you have to go through this together and that after pregnancy you can look like before.
If that doesn't help and he's not ready to endure the pregnancy with you, then separate yourself from him. It won't be anything after the birth of the child. If he cheats now, he won't let it go, even if it's all over.
If he feels 66kg at 1.73m as fat, he has a completely wrong attitude to weight. Especially if the person is still in the 22 weeks gestation!
Less weight would even be dangerous for the child, I don't know the weight limits for the size, but your gynecologist would be happy to see them.
You should have a clarifying conversation with your friend that he is just acting like a total idiot and you think about separation if he doesn't behave properly again. You're the one whose hormones are going crazy and who may be acting weird, not him.
Yes, some men no longer find the pregnant woman so attractive or are afraid of harming the child, but then you have to talk about it. In this case, you just sit out the phase until the pregnancy is over.
The wife of my colleague mutates pregnant to a monster, complains about every little thing and has extreme fluctuations in feeling (precisely because she then realizes how stupid she behaved and that she was exaggerating, but simply could not suppress the strong anger). They talked about it, especially when the second child was planned and after that it was good again. It is important to stand together and to be honest.
If he continues to misbehave, then separation may be the better way. Or do you want your children to think that behavior towards a woman is normal?
The pain and crying from you is not good for you and your two children.
